...makes Jim a dull boy.

Newest on the list of scary good deepfake videos is this one cribbing Kubrick's masterpiece The Shining.

I wonder. What is it about The Shining that makes it such fertile ground for fan videos? 

Blank Tape Bazaar Vol. 6

Hey all. For the last edition of BTB, I'll be posting what I'm sure a lot of you still have kicking around in your junk drawers or behind your TV wall units - blank VHS labels.

I must confess I was pretty anal about properly labelling tapes back in the day and since my collection at its height numbered over four-hundred tapes, I had to often get a little creative as each brand seemed to supply their own amount of digits and symbols.

I distinctly remember the oldest labels by Embassy Gold above had a glossy finish which made them more difficult to write on. I had to forego using pencil for the finality of pen.

As I said before, in the later stages of my recording days, the gold Memorex became my go-to, so I literally have stacks of those above. 

I always liked the symbols on the one above and used the cartoon one on all my anime tapes.

I spoke about the surprisingly high quality of the Blockbuster brand, which is why that one above is the only unused label I still have.

I was always grateful of the brands that gave you letter options, as I used letter suffixes for all my television stuff - X for X-Files, T for Twin Peaks, V for music videos and so on...

So that's it! I hope you enjoyed reminiscing with me. If you want to relive them in all their musty glory, check out the links below.

Blank Tape Bazaar
Blank Tape Bazaar 2
Blank Tape Bazaar 3
Blank Tape Bazaar 4
Blank Tape Bazaar 5

Until next time, stay safe kiddies!

Lustig's Last Gleaming

This week's VHS was Bill Lustig's 1996 holiday horror Uncle Sam.

A soldier killed by friendly fire in Kuwait returns to his hometown on Independence Day to seek revenge on unpatriotic Americans.

I love that lenticular cover above. I'd been meaning to watch this for a while, but obviously wanted to wait for the appropriate date to roll around. Sadly though, I must admit Uncle Sam was a little disappointing. Lustig and writer Larry Cohen are a winning combination, as evidenced by the Maniac Cop films, but something was amiss here.

Is it just me, or is that bathroom window massive?

It's very difficult to pin down, but some of it had to do with my constant confusion during the movie, starting with the family dynamic. I kept on getting the lead Jody's (Chris Ogden) mother and aunt mixed up because the latter seemed more age appropriate. I also found it weird this kid was super obsessed with a distant uncle (Sam!) than his actual father – though he was absent, as well. Add in some random subplots, like the blind boy that comes out of nowhere an hour in and I was like, okay sure, why not? Pile it on!

Mainly, I think this movie needed someone like Michael Moriarty or Bruce Campbell to punch things up. Isaac Hayes helped some, but it didn't help that it was almost fourty-five minutes before shit started happening. I was beginning to wonder if there was actually going to be any gore in this thing, but thankfully it finally arrived climaxing in a pretty bad-ass full body burn – in a scene that Imdb tells me got film productions banned from that town forever.

Uncle Sam was basically a lesser version of Maniac Cop, only veering off to satirize the concept of blind allegiance that I guess, in a roundabout way, makes it as topical as ever.

Hundred P, this kid voted for Trump. Honestly though, as far as lenticular horrors go, I prefer Jack Frost. It's a bad movie to be sure, but at least it leans into it in an entertaining way. Oh, and it doesn't have a kid burning his G.I. Joes. That made me wince.

Short of the Week #71: The Cure

Here below is Mike Olenick's 2017 short film, The Cure. A weirder work you may never see. Buckle up.

Blank Tape Bazaar Vol. 5

This week, I've got a few more recordable VHS from the past starting with consummate electronic brands in Sony and JVC.

Perhaps the most distinct looking brand, next to maybe Polaroid, would have to be Kodak.

I mean, you can spot those off-yellow jacket covers from across a room, amirite? To round out things here today are a couple of others I found lying around.

 

Again, with the lifetime warranty. I still wonder if anyone ever called them on that.

And with that, I have now tapped out the blanks I have at my disposal, but check back next week for one last edition of Blank Tape Bazaar. See you then.

Happy...

R.I.P. Billy Drago 1945-2019

Billy Drago, actor and quintessential villain of the home video era and beyond, passed away this week in Los Angeles. He was 73.

Rest in peace, Billy.